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OPINION

Negotiating With Space Nazis

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.

On Tuesday, the Iranian government announced that it had reached a secret agreement with the West on its nuclear development. The details of the agreement were not released, but suffice it to say that the Iranians could not contain their glee. Iranian President Hassan Rouhani celebrated the deal with an English-language tweet claiming that the "world powers surrendered to Iranian nation's will"; Iranian Army Commander Maj. Gen. Ataollah Salehi said the diplomatic breakthrough resulted from American military "weakness"; and the Iranian foreign minister laid a wreath at the tomb of the Beirut Marine barracks bomber.

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Meanwhile, President Barack Obama urged the United States Congress to "give peace a chance." After weeks of sending out his pacifist minions, including faux pro-Israel group J Street, to tell Americans that support for sanctions meant support for war, Obama himself echoed that message. "My preference is for peace and diplomacy," the apparent flower-child-in-chief stated. "And this is one of the reasons why I've sent the message to Congress that now is not the time for us to impose new sanctions. Now is the time for us to allow the diplomats and technical experts to do their work." He said that a rational, reasonable Iran would be "willing to walk through the door of opportunity that's presented to them."

Only Iran is not rational or reasonable. It is delusionally anti-Western and anti-Semitic, which means that America is now in negotiations not just with a terror-supporting state but radicals with more than a hint of insanity.

To prove this point, on Sunday, the Iranian semiofficial news agency FARS, which bills itself as independent but is effectively regime-run, ran a news article explaining that since the end of World War II, America had been run by a shadow government of Nazi space aliens. Seriously.

Basing its report on documents supposedly culled from National Security Agency leaker Edward Snowden, FARS reported that there was no "incontrovertible proof" that the American foreign policy agenda was driven by an "alien/extraterrestrial intelligence agenda."

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Not "alien" as in foreigner. "Alien" as in little green men from Mars. FARS quotes Snowden as stating that there "were actually two governments in the U.S., one that was elected, and the other, secret regime, governing in the dark." This shadow regime had been run by space aliens -- also known as "Tall Whites" -- who were operating their regime from Nevada after emigrating from Nazi Germany after World War II. These space aliens, FARS stated, built the Nazi war machine's submarines.

This would be hilarious were it not part of a piece. Large swaths of the Islamic world also buy the myth that Jews use the blood of non-Jewish children in both their Passover matza and Purim hamentashen. "The Protocols of the Elders of Zion" remains a best-seller throughout the Islamic world. Iranian television routinely broadcasts Holocaust denial, while Iranian press outlets proclaim that the Zionist regime is producing another Hitler.

Assume for a moment that the Iranian regime actually believes the propaganda it spouts. Why, then, would it negotiate in good faith with space alien Nazis who drink Muslim blood?

Many pacifists in the West, including Obama, apparently assume that no one rational would continue to develop nuclear weapons in the face of world opposition, especially when offered a way out. What Obama fails to recognize is that Iran is far from rational -- and, more importantly, Obama's own assumptions about Iranian intentions put America and the West in a position of weakness. This weakness will be on display for all the world to see when Iran goes nuclear.

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