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The Press Now Sees Problems With Kash Patel Gifting Bourbon; Voting In a Primary Makes One MAGA Exremists

Brad Slager
Brad Slager  |  May 07, 2026
The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.


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Artisanally-Crafted Narratives – THE ATLANTIC

  • This is starting to sound almost childish. 

Sarah Fitzpatrick, the reporter who claims dozens of witnesses to Kash Patel drinking binges, yet is unable to get a single one to go on the record, is now out with another…ummm…” scathing” report on the FBI Director, we guess.

Sarah informs us that Patel has been handing out customized bottles of bourbon! (Enter GASP! → Here.) He has bottles of Woodford Reserve that bear the FBI insignia and his name. 

This is positioned as something of a problem, as one nameless (of course) agent details that they find it problematic and somewhat threatening…to be given a gift from the director.

  • Another former agent described the bottles as “demoralizing,” because they suggest one set of standards for the director and another for the rest of the bureau. This person said he believes that many agents would worry that if the director offers you a bottle, and “you aren’t on board on receiving it enthusiastically, you are getting polygraphed for loyalty.” The fear of retribution has deterred some staff from reporting their concerns to supervisors or through channels reserved for whistleblowers. 

That is nothing more than hysterical guessing made by someone not in the Bureau, but we are told to care. As for the problems of these bottles: Fitzpatrick undercuts this by informing readers there had been an online auction for one such bottle, and The Atlantic purchased the bourbon, complete with Patel’s signature on the glass, and the #9, indicating how he is the ninth director at the FBI.


Low Octane Gas Lighting – MS NOW / THE ATLANTIC

  •   Not every story is about the press, you do grasp that?

Carol Leonnig looks at the developments with Director Kash Patel responding to the reports in The Atlantic by looking into leaks at the Bureau, and she concludes that they could not help themselves from arriving at: He is investigating reporter Sarah Fitzpatrick.

Except, he is not.


Democratic Custodial Services -- CNN

  • These two experts were incapable of ferreting out the core facts?!

After the news of the FBI raid on the offices of Virginia politician Louise Lucas, Jake Tapper brought on disgraced FBI figure Andrew McCabe (really, we are still doing that, with Him?!) The two badgered about the prospect that Lucas was being targeted over her work on the Virginia redistricting efforts in that state, and how unacceptable this is for the DOJ.

Both of them needed to minimize the fact that the investigations into her corruption began years ago, in the Biden administration.


Presentation Paradox – THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER

  • Sooo…you are lobbying to only be a little less offensive…??

Coming this summer is the long-anticipated epic from Christopher Nolan, his interpretation of “The Odyssey”. At The Hollywood Reporter, they caught some advanced peeks at the upcoming release, and it finds one element objectionable: The cast is using American accents.

It is bad enough to expect the cast to speak in Greek, but also we are talking about the time of the 12th century B.C., when the language would be even more distant.

The wizards at THR are not expecting that. Just…not American dialects.

  • The modern British accent is traditionally considered universally pleasing and “just foreign enough” to convey a timeless quality (even though it’s only existed in its current form for 250 years or so). 


DNC PR Firm – CNN

  • Now the measure of extremism is Republicans voting in a primary.

After the votes came in Tuesday night from the Indiana primary races, the results showed several incumbent GOP members of the state House were voted out. This is extremism, according to Antjuan Seawright, sitting on the panel. 

His logic is that the MAGA extremists are the ones who turn out for mid-term intra-state primary elections. Consider this news to us, but we are more curious why no extremists turn out in Democratic Party races.


Low Octane Gas Lighting – MS NOW

  • Don’t watch the presser, just take their word on it.

People are still talking about what a good job Marco Rubio did manning the podium at the White House press briefing, with Karoline Leavitt out on maternity leave. So, of course, when the overall impression had been that Rubio was impressive, here comes Nicolle Wallace, with guest simp Tim Miller, to declare Rubio shamed himself and was embarrassed by his performance.

If you want to see a prime example of whichacating, this segment serves as just that definition.