Pity the poor Democrats – actually, don’t pity them because they are terrible people, and their sorry situation is purely of their own making. They got too used to being in charge, too used to ruling from their throne, and now that they have to get off it they have found that their spindly legs have withered and atrophied, so they hobble around, unable to stand fully upright. It’s funny for us, but it’s an existential challenge for them. What are the Democrats to do? Who do the Democrats have to try to do it with? Their bench is worse than the 2024 White Sox, which is a sportsball metaphor indicating that they’ve got nobody good on their team. And they’ve got no prospects for the future.
Now, this is all great for America, but we need to temper our gloating by remembering that we’re Republicans, and Republicans have a unique ability to squander any advantage they happen to have, so let’s not get too uppity just yet. Yet, we do appear to be in a rare interregnum when Republicans are making smart choices and ruthlessly pressing their advantage, so maybe this is when we run up the score. The Democrats are down, and I say kick ‘em in the gut.
The Democrats have the worst issue set ever. They’re still embracing the same nonsense that helped lose them the election. Complicating it is that they have an opponent with a supernatural power to make his opponents assume the least viable political position possible at any given time simply because it’s the opposite of where he says he stands. Trump has maneuvered these people into deciding that the hill they want to die on is USAID funding of bizarre social pathologies overseas and of the regime media here at home. If there are two things the American people dislike, it’s foreign aid and the pinko press, yet that’s where the Democrats decided to position themselves – as unapologetic Japanese soldiers 40 years after the war fighting to the death to take hard-working Americans’ money and give it to grubby, ungrateful foreigners and the reporters who hate them. The other issues they’ve decided to stick with are just as unpopular. DEI? Everybody outside of a faculty lounge and the Beltway hates it. Trans lunatics and perverts who want to hang out in girls’ changing rooms? Again, there are skin rashes that poll better. Where are the Democrats? All over them. And that was just last week.
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But it’s the snarling, dead-eyed faces of the Democrats that’s their most pronounced problem. Who is their new leader? Who is the Democrat leader they expect America to rally around? Instead of putting up somebody America might embrace, they put up a cast of chumps who are collectively less attractive than the Wellesley lacrosse team.
They’ve tried the wrinkled faces of the past, and that hasn’t worked. The Democrats are a gerontocracy, most of them crusty relics from a bygone era. Nancy Pelosi’s been sidelined by her broken hip and raging love of Chardonnay. Al Green, not the singer, recently filed articles of impeachment against the president because why not and then went out in front of the USAID building to wave his cane in solidarity with the freeloading government drones he represents.
They wheeled out Maxine Waters to make some vague threats of violence, but all that came out of her mouth was dust. Several Democrats were up there threatening to take it to the streets. They should go for it. I was informed – by them – that this would be an insurrection, but with Pam Bondi as the new Attorney General, they’ve made the smart choice of not testing that out. It’s all fun and games until you realize that the government you weaponized is now in the hands of the guy you weaponized it against.
And then there’s Chuck Schumer, who only looks viable when standing next to the elderly Mitch McConnell. Remember, he’s the dude who puts Swiss slices on raw hamburger patties in his “I’m just like you stinking peasants” barbecue photos. The highlight of his appearance was when he tried to lead a chant from the audience of bureaucrats, paid activists, and other misfits. It was like a little-known opening band trying in vain to get the crowd to sing along when the crowd not only didn’t know the song but was waiting for the headliner. You had to have a heart of stone not to laugh. These crusty, fussy fossils generate all the searing excitement of a quilting bee, where they’re passing around Quaaludes.
The ones we were informed were the future have been passed over. Kamala is, well, Kamala. Hairstyle Newsom saw his future go up in flames. Josh Shapiro is wisely distancing himself from this ritual suicide pact. Governor, JB Pritzker makes Chris Christie look like Kate Moss.
So, who is the donkey’s great anti-white hope? That’s an important question because the latest Democrat the regime media has decided to swoon over is the aggressively loud and aggressively stupid Jasmine Crockett, all wild gesticulations, inarticulate howling, and gratuitous racial slurs. Crockett is like a political Netflix reboot – they took George Wallace and made him an obnoxious black woman. She decided it would be a genius idea to announce that the people who oppose her are “mediocre white men.” It’s an interesting choice of how best to claw back this enormous potential group of voters – voters who are often mirrored at the ballot box by the presumably “mediocre white” women who love them. Explicit racial hatred directed at the largest group of voters is either the most intellectually and morally bankrupt political strategy of all time or some 4D chess move by a political idiot savant. If you’re a betting man, woman, or non-binary, you’ll want to put your money on it being the latter, less the “savant” part.
Speaking of mediocre white men, the Democrat Party has plenty of them. What they lack in melanin and testosterone, they attempt to make up with girlish shouting and unseemly hysterics. Pete Buttigieg is still in the mix. He’s moved to Michigan because he apparently thinks people in Michigan are stupider than people in his actual home state of Indiana, and he plans on running for the open Senate seat in 2026. Imagine being so bereft of talent that you decide you’ve got to import Pete Buttigieg.
There’s Rep. Dan Goldman, the senator from Levi Strauss. He’s very, very concerned about billionaires, probably because he’s only a multi-multi-millionaire, and he’s jealous. His list of accomplishments includes being born into a rich family, being gay, and being born into a rich family. Goldman likes to get on Twitter and say things. They are usually dumb things.
And there’s also Senator Chris Murphy, who likes to fulminate about how we are having a constitutional crisis because the guy who won the election gained the right to exercise constitutional powers is exercising his constitutional powers. He’s also very excited that he can slightly delay Donald Trump getting all his cabinet picks confirmed. Take that! The Democrats have set an ultra-low bar for success, and yet they seem able to limbo right under it.
Posturing and procrastination – that’s really all they have. It’s clearly not working. Every day brings new humiliations and subsequent new tantrums. One of the key factors in the Trump 2.0 administration’s plan is to simply ignore these people. Trump acts like they are not even there, and they aren’t. There’s nobody home. It’s all sham outrage and Potemkin antics. We’ve got unattractive people defending unattractive positions in unattractive ways. You almost pity them, but then you remember how evil they are, and you just want to savor their pain.
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