With Father’s Day approaching, we should remind ourselves that the Founding Fathers were not only America’s symbolic fathers, but many were pulling dual duties as real fathers as well. John Adams was the father to six children, four of whom lived to adulthood. John’s commitment to our nation and his family is worthy of honor as we prepare to celebrate our country’s 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence in 2026.
As the relationship between America and Britain deteriorated throughout the late 1700s, John was frequently called away from home to participate in both the First and Second Continental Congresses. Though absent for extended periods of time, he made sure to write to his family whenever he could while he worked tirelessly for the nation’s future.
As many of my readers know, becoming a parent transforms one’s outlook on life. Any parent knows that, from the moment you hold your child for the first time, your responsibilities shift towards taking care of them. The love and moments you share with them are irreplaceable. John had to sacrifice many of those precious moments with his children to serve his country, yet his letters show that his love for them never changed, and he longed to be with them.
In a heart-wrenching letter to Abigail in 1776, John wrote that “It is a cruel Reflection, which very often comes across me, that I should be seperated so far, from those Babes, whose Education And Welfare lies so near my Heart: But greater Misfortunes than these, must not divert Us from Superiour Duties.” While he ended this line reminding himself of his duty to his country, he nevertheless made it clear that he longed to be with his family.
He further wrote of his desire to “to take a Walk with you in the Garden -- to go over to the Common -- the Plain -- the Meadow. I want to take Charles in one Hand and Tom in the other, and Walk with you, Nabby [John’s nickname for daughter Abigail] on your Right Hand and John upon my left, to view the Corn Fields, the orchards, &c.” The letters show that, though he may have been a revolutionary, he was always a father first in his heart; nothing brought him greater joy than being with his children and his wife.
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John suffered through the heartbreak of outliving most of his children. His only surviving daughter, Abigail , died of breast cancer in 1813 at age 48 in the family home; his second son, Charles, succumbed to alcoholism in 1800 at age 30.
Under the pressures of the Second Continental Congress, John kept encouraging his children to be strong. In a letter written in 1776 to his eldest son (and future president) John Quincy Adams, he asked him to recognize “how many Losses, Dangers, and Inconveniences, have been borne by your Parents, and the Inhabitants of Boston in general for the Sake of preserving Freedom for you, and yours,” reminding him of the revolution’s importance and the sacrifices others had made.
Later, while occupied with the vice presidency, John made sure that his children had a secure path for their future. In a 1790 letter to John Quincy regarding his son’s future employment, John assures him that “If, after your Term with Mr Parsons [the jurist John Quincy was apprenticing under] expires your Judgment, Inclination and Advice of your Friends lead you to Boston, you shall have my full Consent and Approbation.”
This Father’s Day, let us honor John Adams as not only one of America’s founding fathers, but as a father who wanted to secure a bright future for his children and for the children of other families across America. A man who orchestrated significant moments, such as George Washington’s appointment as commanding general and selecting Thomas Jefferson to write the Declaration of Independence, while cherishing the beauty of fatherhood, knowing that he and his family sacrificed greatly on the road to independence and self-rule.
John Adams wrote to John Quincy that he and his siblings sould “follow the virtuous Example if, in any future Time, your Countrys Liberties should be in Danger, and suffer every human Evil, rather than Give them up.” These are not only words for his children, but words that should resonate with us today as we remember the sacrifices our founding fathers and mothers made for us and our country. May we always be on guard to ensure our liberties remain intact.
Jackie Cushman is President of the Adams Memorial Foundation.
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