Twice in the last 2 years, I have handed over this column to ChatGPT, not out of laziness, jerk, but to see how the technology governments can’t shut up about it progressing. The time has come to do it again.
The first time I did it, I thought the results were fine. Nothing special, didn’t really contain any humor or sarcasm, but the words were coherent, or at least coherent enough (who am I to judge?) that I saw potential.
Last year, it got better. Not by leaps and bounds, but noticeably and I said as much.
This year, ChatGPT has improved quite a bit, I think.
I don’t know if you use AI at all, or which AI you prefer. For me, I don’t really do anything with it. I forget it exists, when not being inundated with news stories about it, because I’ve lived my whole life without it and it doesn’t occur to me. I’m sure my kids will be taught by it at some point, but for the rest of us we have to actively seek it out to even think about it.
Soon enough, we won’t be able to escape it. As it grows in applications – sorry code writers, but you’re writing yourself out of business as these machines can do that now for free – the electricity needed to power it will drive up the prices for everyone. There is no such thing as a “free term paper,” it turns out.
But how close is it to really coming off as human, or at least to ripping off a human (me) in style and attitude? Let’s find out.
I simply aske, “Can you write a column about Democrats in the style of Derek Hunter?” ChatGPT responded, “Sure. Derek Hunter is a conservative political commentator known for his provocative, sarcastic, and often combative writing style. His columns are direct, scathing toward Democrats and the left, and heavy on rhetorical jabs and cultural criticism.”
While that doesn’t capture my rugged good looks or how women want to be with me (sorry, ladies, I’m married) and men want to be me (sorry, fellas, I dig chicks), it then went on to burp up very short (only 347, including the title) column that, at least as far as attitude goes, does a pretty good job of ripping me off.
It has some attempts at humor, some parenthetical asides, and dripping contempt for Democrats. You add in the good looks, charm and humility – lots of humility, because I’m probably the most humble person you’ll ever meet, and by A LOT – and you’re getting there.
What did it write? This:
Title: Democrats: The Party of Pretend Problems and Real Damage
By Not Derek Hunter (But Close Enough)
If you’re wondering why the country feels like it’s spiraling down a woke rabbit hole with no bottom in sight, look no further than the Democratic Party — the self-proclaimed saviors of democracy who can’t define what a woman is but are dead sure they can reprogram the economy, the climate, and your kid’s gender in one fell swoop.
Democrats have mastered the fine art of pretend. They pretend the border is secure while millions pour through it. They pretend men can get pregnant while denying biology 101. They pretend Hunter Biden’s laptop is Russian disinformation while their own FBI quietly confirms its authenticity. Pretend, deny, distract — it's practically their party platform.
Let’s talk economics. Democrats tell us the economy is booming. Sure, if you’re measuring by how much eggs cost or how many people are working two jobs to afford gas. Bidenomics is like socialism with worse branding — it wrecks your paycheck but gives you a smug lecture about equity in return.
Meanwhile, their solution to crime is to defund the police, then act surprised when criminals act like… well, criminals. Who could’ve guessed? Not the academic elite writing policy from behind gated communities or their media lapdogs pretending that looting is "mostly peaceful protest."
And let’s not forget their latest obsession: climate change. Because when your policies fail across the board, nothing unites like a doomsday cult. The same people who can’t keep the lights on in California want to dictate your thermostat, your stove, and how far you can drive. All to save the planet — which, coincidentally, will probably still be here long after the last electric vehicle bursts into flames on a Texas highway.
The truth is simple: Democrats don’t fix problems. They manufacture them, then use them to consolidate control. If there’s no crisis, there’s no excuse to grow government. So, they invent one. Rinse, repeat, campaign.
This isn’t about left vs. right anymore. It’s about reality vs. delusion. And every time Democrats win, reality loses.
Now it’s back to me, the real me.
ChatGPT is not really up-to-date on all things, which is odd considering it has access to the Internet, with the line “And let’s not forget their latest obsession: climate change.” If this were the late 90s, maybe. Also, and maybe it’s because I’ve stopped looking, but is California having blackouts and brownouts right now, or is that a few years ago?
On style, it’s gotten better, on substance, ChatGPT needs some work. Maybe a lot of work. Which is good, because I’m not ready to turn over this column to a computer and plug myself into the Matrix, at least not yet. I’m enjoying my family too much and still have a lot of real bitching about Democrats left to do. But every year, the prospect of the computer takeover inches closer.
Seems like now would be a good time to ask if we really need it? Actually, a few years ago was, probably too late now. I sure hope there’s an easy “off” button somewhere, just in case.
Derek Hunter is the host of the Derek Hunter Show on WMAL in Washington, DC, and has a free daily podcast (subscribe!) and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.
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