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OPINION

If Republicans Controlled Democrats We’d Pretty Much Do What They’re Doing Now

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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AP Photo/Matt Rourke

Honestly, watching Democrats run around like chickens with their heads cut off is one of life’s simple pleasures. They are completely lost; rudderless fools desperate to find a simple answer to their problems that does not involve anything remotely close to the truth: that their problems exist because their policies have failed and what they want to impose on people is not wanted by the vast majority of Americans.

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After last year’s election, Democrats looked to blame everyone but the reflection in the mirror. It was glorious.

Since then, they have learned nothing. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Bernie Sanders are “touring the country” holding rallies that are literally rallies for people who already agree with them and do nothing to expand their base. They have no idea how to convince anyone to their side because A) their side consists exclusively of failure, and B) they don’t bother to speak with anyone who disagrees with them, so they have no idea not only how to convince someone to their side, they don’t even know how to talk with them.

When a Democrat finds themselves engaging with someone they disagree with out in the wild, they tend to scream “racist!” and either run away or block them on social media. That’s not how you win people to your side. That their two leaders – the closest thing they have to “stars” on their side – are people known for being angry and thin-skinned is awesome, I would have picked them.

But it’s not just the radical loser tour that is a problem for Democrats, it’s literally everything.

Tim Walz, the coked-up Muppet I affectionately call Fraudie Murphy for his string of complete and total lies about his military service, thinks he stands a chance at the 2028 Democratic nomination for president. And you know what? He’s right, he does stand a chance, they’re that weak.

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Timmy, with an unstable-seeming wife and kids at home, has hit the road himself to remind everyone of just how big of a bullet we dodged by not electing him vice-president. Thank God for JD Vance.

He’s cheering the idea of Americans losing good paying manufacturing jobs if they happen to work for Tesla, he’s going off on semi-finished rants about how evil it is that Elon Musk has been successful, and he’s extolling the virtues of people who don’t contribute to society, like himself. You give me a box of rejected parts from a normal political party – things they’re desperately trying to avoid in a leader – and I couldn’t build you Tim Walz. I could get close, but getting that bizarre – his inability to form and convey a complete thought without going off on 15 tangents is unrivaled – would be impossible without a series of closed-head injuries.

Then there is Kamala Harris. Did you know that the Harris/Walz campaign is still trying to raise money? They dropped the “Walz” part, because even they recognize how big of a mistake that was, and are now the “Harris Fight Fund.”

They emailed Sunday, “Kamala Harris is wondering if there is ANYTHING we can say to convince you to make a contribution to the Democratic National Committee today. Please let us try before you click away. What if we told you that Elon Musk is trying to buy Wisconsin's Supreme Court election, spending more than $10 million so far, and if we can beat him it'd be a great rebuke to Elon and the far-right in this critical election? What if we told you the DNC is holding rallies in states all across the country, because organizing outside of DC is how we stop Trump and Elon's tax cuts for billionaires paid for by cuts to programs people need to survive? And what if we told you the DNC is leading the fight to make sure we elect Democrats up-and-down the ballot in the next election? We need a check on Trump's power, and flipping the House or Senate gets it done. But none of this — none of it — is possible without grassroots support from Democrats who care enough to act.”

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It's amazing how little any Democrat can do without some suckers reaching into their pockets to pick up the tab. All these rich Democrats begging for $5 and $10 donations, and people give it. Crazy.

None of this is to mention that Joe and Jill Biden have emerged from whatever rock they crawled under to offer their help in electing Democrats too. Honestly, if I were a Jedi and spent my time trying to ruin Democrats, I’m not sure what I’d do differently than what they’re doing to themselves. I love it. Bring back Bill and Hillary, too! And can we dig up Jimmy Carter, or is that in poor taste? Whatever. Enjoy it while you can, they can’t stay this awful forever, right?

 

Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!) and author of the book, Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.

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